Jesus Says Buy More Shoes, pt.1

Two years ago, on my first visit to New Orleans, I saw a GORRRRgeous piece of folk art: a black Jesus was on a cross with women's shoes dripping from his nailed palms. Over his head was a banner reading, "Jesus Says Buy More Shoes." I wanted to buy it but I didn't have the balls. Instead I bought a flattened metal trash can lid reading "Not Mad, Not Sad, Be Jolly", with a self-portrait of a cigar-smoking Big Al in the middle. It's a cute cop-out. Anyhoo, all that to say, I'm going to use this skurry title to post my fashion smack talk. If you're waiting with bated breath, may I suggest a mint?